Talk to Me #10: Chase Compton

Jan 9, 2017 by

Talk to Me #10: Chase Compton

Where you learned to love. 

I suppose I learned to love from watching my parents do it. They’ve been together forever, and they’re still deeply in love–and best friends as well. Seeing them has always given me hope that one day I’ll meet someone who will stick around through thick and thin, and still laugh at my dumb jokes, and be my better half.

Your first cut – was it the deepest? 

No way. The more I love, the more I understand it. The more I understand it, the more I value it. The more I value it, the more the thought of losing it or never having it again absolutely terrifies me. Each cut has taught me what a treasure love it while it’s within your grasp.

Your “type” – and why. 

On a purely superficial level, I tend to gravitate towards guys who are the complete opposite of me. Wholesome, all-American, guy next door types. Simple-like guys who aren’t as wild as I am. I want to say this is my type, but it truth I always end up with the bad boys. What I like and what I pursue are at times two completely different things.

Your favourite literary romance. 

The Princess and the Outlaw from Tom Robbin’s “Still Life With Woodpecker.” There is something so beautiful about falling in love with someone so deeply that you see beyond their status or rank or what they “are.” They are so sexy, and volatile, and dangerous together. It’s really my dream romance.

Your thoughts on friends being lovers. 

I’ve slept with quite a few of my friends. It’s usually not a big deal at all–gays are so typical about stuff like this. If anything, I think it would be awesome to have a friend turn into a lover who actually loves me. The semantics of it are all sorts of confusing.

Your thoughts on the net amounts of pleasure and pain. 

I’ve had enough pain for now. I only care to focus on pleasure these days. 

Your story about unrequited love.

I’ve also had just about enough of this to last a life time. I don’t fuck with unrequited love anymore. There will probably always be a sexy guy who’s out of my league that I’ll be pining for, but love is a whole other story. If love doesn’t want me back, then I’m not giving it the time of day. It’s too exhausting.

Your favourite author/artist on love.

PJ Harvey’s lyrical content has always inspired me in many ways. Mostly because her music deals with all different sides of love: longing, loss, obsession, lust, mourning, all that. She’s such a brilliant wordsmith. Her music is pure poetry.

Your reconciliation of the domestic and the erotic. 

Next question.

Your thoughts on marriage. 

I love the thought of it, even though so many gays in 2016 have seemed to evolve away from the idea of marriage. I come from parents that are still together, and they make marriage look awesome–in that way I’ve always admired them and aspired to follow in their footsteps. I do, however, realize that their lifestyles could not be any more different than mine. It’s still such a nice thought though.

Love changes when you have children. 

This is so beyond the realm of my comprehension. At least for now.

Your thoughts on resisting temptation. 

I’m as loyal as they come, and perhaps this is to a fault. Because I am loyal, I expect it of everyone else, and I know this is kind of foolish of me. Maybe it’s something to do with the fact like I’m a Leo. When I’m pet in the right way, I’m yours. One hundred percent.

Your advice on breaking up. 

Write your own happy ending. No breakup is ever the final chapter. It may be the end of a relationship, but there is still so much story left in you to tell. So move forward with truth, and honesty, and integrity. Scream your pain from the mountaintops, but don’t let yourself become that pain. And remember: someday you’ll probably laugh at this.

The influence of love on your work.

It’s everything. Nothing influences my work more than love. I used to be inspired by the darker sides of love: loss, and pain, and all that shit. But now I feel like I’m starting to gravitate more towards the more abstract, optimistic sides of love. Not just romantic love too–I’m influenced by it’s many forms.

Your lessons from love. 

I’m learning as I go. I know that trying to give lessons on love is a lost cause, because every case is unique. In truth, I’m still trying to wrap my head around most of it. At least it’s a fun ride trying to figure it all out.

Your greatest regret in love. 

None. Even if I’ve done things that I’m embarrassed by, I know in my heart of hearts that it’s come from a place of love–and that makes everything okay. I don’t regret anything. Even the stupid stuff, or the bad stuff, or fights and shit. It’s all part of the process. And it’s all good.

Your thoughts on infidelity – one night stand, fling, or affair. 

It’s shitty. The most pain I’ve ever felt has been because of betrayal, and because of that I’m probably cured of ever cheating on someone I truly love. 

Your feelings about the existence of a soulmate.

Fuck I hope so. I really, really hope so.

Your ideal love: madness or redemption? 

Redemption. I wanted to say something predictable and cliche like a combination of both, but the truth is I’m so over madness. What I’m looking to get out of love, at least at this current juncture in life, is redemption. I’ve had a rough past with love, and I really hope that eventually I get whatever sour feelings I used to have resolved by redemption.

Your advice on making love last. 

If I knew the answer to this, I’d probably not be a writer.

Chase Compton, author of The Yelp: A Heartbreak in Reviews, manages a bar in West Hollywood and is finishing his second memoir, an homage to LA.

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